If you can swing it financially, I'd like you to consider making a charitable contribution to the worthy cause of your choice. I personally prefer organizations that help children that are having a rough way to go, 'cause that's just something I particularly care about, but you might rather help stop some fucked-up disease, for example, or the euthanization of stray doggies and kitties. I waited on some executives for the American Red Cross one time who left a bad impression with me, so I usually won't give that organization jack shit, but I'll make an exception when stuff happens like the recent unpleasantnesses in McClennan County, TX and Boston. I never give anything online but I try and send out a little check or money order donation from time to time. Or at least I would if so much of my income didn't have to go to such crucial purchases as beer, cigarettes and lottery tickets.
The point is, I whole-heartedly approve of making gifts that help to increase things that are good or to cock-block things that are bad. Most restaurants now and then try and extract donations from their guests and they really need to stop that shit right now. Or at least dial it down a little. Specifically, they need to stop requiring me to promote their pet cause, what with all the other crap I've gotta deal with at work. I'll be happy to collect some donations, I just don't want to have to ask for them.
Like maybe if the restaurant is pretty casual, the employees could wear buttons saying, "Ask me how you can help stop Non-Hodgkins Perineal Infartions!" or something like that, and if guests want to inquire about that, great. If the "flair" is unacceptable, a plea for charity could be written on the features blackboard next to the hostess stand. If the establishment is pretty swanky—and in my experience, those kinds of places are the least likely to put the extra squeeze on their clients—there's a $1600 Phaser® Multifunction printer from Xerox® and lots of nice vellum back in the office that some classy-looking menu inserts could be created on. Whatever.
Waiting tables isn't nearly as easy as a lot of the public seems to think it is. We've got to smile and act nice no matter how hungover we are. We're expected to have a lot of knowledge about the restaurant, its product and policies. There's a lot of learning and memorization. We've got to put forth a massive effort to "upsell" our guests—a lot of whom don't want to hear that shit—and get them to part with more money than they'd intended. If it's a corporate place, they're constantly on the servers to get clients to sign up for email club or take the bitch-ass survey that randomly appears on some of the receipts.
I do all this and a lot more and I do it with a smile because that's my job. I don't mind collecting donations if clients want to give them. But having to plead for, or really, even mention, them on top of everything else I've gotta stress about is asking too much and I'm not gonna do it anymore.
How do you feel about it?
The point is, I whole-heartedly approve of making gifts that help to increase things that are good or to cock-block things that are bad. Most restaurants now and then try and extract donations from their guests and they really need to stop that shit right now. Or at least dial it down a little. Specifically, they need to stop requiring me to promote their pet cause, what with all the other crap I've gotta deal with at work. I'll be happy to collect some donations, I just don't want to have to ask for them.
Like maybe if the restaurant is pretty casual, the employees could wear buttons saying, "Ask me how you can help stop Non-Hodgkins Perineal Infartions!" or something like that, and if guests want to inquire about that, great. If the "flair" is unacceptable, a plea for charity could be written on the features blackboard next to the hostess stand. If the establishment is pretty swanky—and in my experience, those kinds of places are the least likely to put the extra squeeze on their clients—there's a $1600 Phaser® Multifunction printer from Xerox® and lots of nice vellum back in the office that some classy-looking menu inserts could be created on. Whatever.
Waiting tables isn't nearly as easy as a lot of the public seems to think it is. We've got to smile and act nice no matter how hungover we are. We're expected to have a lot of knowledge about the restaurant, its product and policies. There's a lot of learning and memorization. We've got to put forth a massive effort to "upsell" our guests—a lot of whom don't want to hear that shit—and get them to part with more money than they'd intended. If it's a corporate place, they're constantly on the servers to get clients to sign up for email club or take the bitch-ass survey that randomly appears on some of the receipts.
I do all this and a lot more and I do it with a smile because that's my job. I don't mind collecting donations if clients want to give them. But having to plead for, or really, even mention, them on top of everything else I've gotta stress about is asking too much and I'm not gonna do it anymore.
How do you feel about it?
