A Ducats Negotiation c 2011 by Joe Sixtop, Master Waiter all rights reserved

     I hadn't seen any live hoops action in a couple of years, so it was past time to go witness America's Team kick some keester in person. My neighbor, Jakey G., who works at McDonald's, had never been to an NBA game and we both had the same day off this week. Hell yeah! We went in his car and split the cost of gas. I did some of the driving, 'cause it's a long trip and we went back home after the game.
     I bought our tickets online from the team's website before we left town. I got a good price on a pair of crappy seats up in nosebleed. Don't Worry! During the first quarter we scoped out some unoccupied prime real estate in the lower bowl area and bailed down there for the final three periods. Before the ducats were cyber-purchased, I thought about some options. One that came to mind was to roll into town without tix and see what was available from the box office and from scalpers. That's when I had this great idea. I didn't use it this trip but I expect to eventually.
     This is America, where more adults have a cell phone than have a place to live. Everyone has a telecommunication device with them at all times. I've bought lots of scalped tickets over the years (and scalped a few myself) and never been ripped off but it's always a concern. So the next time I'm in a ducats negotiation I'm going to ask the entrpreneur for their cell number (if they balk at my request, no sale) and call it immediately. I'll hear a ring(tone) and know I've got their digits. I'll assure them that I'll delete their information as soon as their product has gotten me inside the building.
     Of course just having someone's number doesn't mean you can find them or whatever if indeed their tickets turn out to be bogus. But having their digits is a good insurance policy. You can at least call (perhaps buning their precious Boost Mobile minutes!) and fuck with them if nothing else and what'll they be able to do about it? Just by asking for their number you might give a crook second thoughts. In some jurisdictions it's illegal to scalp tickets but legal to buy scalped tickets. If that's what's up you may be able to get law enforcement involved, if you're so inclined. I have a pretty good grasp of what you have to go through to get money and I hate to think of you getting screwed out of any. I'm hoping this idea of mine (which you can have for free) will prevent somebody from getting burned by scammers.
     You'll be happy to know that the story has a happy ending. After struggling mightily for the first 47 minutes of a terrific game, my favorite basketball team came back in the final 60 seconds and won by five points!